Taking care of others during an emergency or crisis

During an emergency or crisis, such as a natural disaster or other major event, it is normal to feel overwhelmed or have a strong emotional response such as sadness, worry, grief or even anger, especially in the short term. For some people, they may feel detached or numb, or experience difficulties with planning, focus or sleep.

In helping others deal with challenging times it is important to remember:

• You don’t need to be an expert to provide support by listening and letting them know you care.
• Everyone will cope a little differently. Respect that everyone will respond in their own way and at their own speed.

If you see someone struggling or going through a tough time, you can:

Let them know they are not alone

Reassure them that you are there for them and happy to listen. If you can, consider making a regular time to call or check in.

Offer practical support, if you are able

For example, ask if you can prepare a meal, offer to do a chore or errand, or ask what else might be helpful.

Breathe together

Encourage each other to take slow, deep breaths. This can help to settle and co-regulate our nervous systems.

Notice how you’re offering to help

It’s not just the act of offering to help, but how you do it. Try to use caring words, a slow pace and a warm tone of voice. This can help to create feelings of being settled and calm. Consider going for a walk, talking shoulder to shoulder rather than face to face can be less confronting and some people find it easier to talk this way.

Take time to listen and validate

Listen carefully and calmly, and allow time for pauses or silence to let them process or gather their thoughts. Being with people whilst they share their feelings and thoughts and just listening, even if you feel uncomfortable or even do not agree with their view, can be helpful. At times of emergency and crisis, being able to speak and have your thoughts acknowledged can help with processing, without the need to come up with solutions or fixes.

Acknowledge good things they are already doing

Let them know what you’ve heard or noticed about what they are doing already to care for themselves and manage the situation. This could include remembering to eat, get rest, doing small things they enjoy and checking in with you. Ask them is there’s anything else they’ve been doing and repeat back to them the positives that you hear.

Let them know it’s ok to need extra help and support

Ask them if they’ve considered accessing a support service. Offer to help connect them and ask them if there’s anything you can do to make it easier to make contact.

Let them know that you’ll follow up with them, and when

Thank them for sharing with you and let them know you’d like to check in again soon. Choose a timeframe that seems right for both of you (for example checking in daily or weekly). Knowing that someone is thinking of them and that they will be back in touch at a particular time can be very comforting.